Nashville "Barbies"

A friend sent this to me in an email, and I just had to share. Having spent almost half my life in the Nashville area, I thought this was pretty funny and wanted to pass this along to my fellow citizens of Nashvegas and the surrounding areas. I was a little disappointed that the author omitted Murfreesboro. What about the co-ed Barbie complete with flip flops, bubble tea, and the green MTSU parking decal prominently displayed from the rear-view mirror of her Prius Hybrid in metallic blue? (That's the warning sign the rest of us M'boro drivers look out for and know to stay the hell away! LOL!!) Jockey Ken sold separately with socks and sandals and a keg in the back seat of his Ford F-150.

Anyway, take a gander and enjoy! Us mommas can use a laugh every once in a while.

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Nashville Barbies

Mattel recently announced the release of limited-edition

Barbie dolls, made especially for the Nashville market.

'Brentwood Barbie'
This princess Barbie is sold only at Green Hills Mall. She comes

with an assortment of Kate Spade Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a

long-haired foreign dog named Honey and a cookie-cutter house.

Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift.
Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with the augmented version.

'Hendersonville Barbie'
The modern day homemaker Barbie is available with the Ford

Winstar Minivan and matching gym outfit.
She gets lost easily and has no full-time occupation.
Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.


'Gallatin Barbie'
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray

Lewis knife, a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a Meth Lab Kit.

This model is only available after dark and must be paid for in cash

(preferably small, untraceable bills) ...unless you are a cop, then

we don't know what you are talking about.



'Cool Springs Barbie'
This Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or

Hummer H2. Included are her Starbucks cup, credit card and

country club membership. Also available for this set are

Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper.
You won't be able to afford any of them.

'Ridgetop Barbie'
This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans

two sizes too small, a NASCAR t-shirt and Tweety Bird tattoo
on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud Light and a Hank Jr.

CD. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt

when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get

a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.

'West End Barbie'
This collagen injected, rhino plastic Barbie wears a leopard print

outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends.
Percocet prescription available as well as warehouse conversion condo.




'Springfield Barbie'
This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own

high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased

beer-gutted Ken out of Ridgetop Barbie's house. Her ensemble

includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through

halter-top. Also available with a mobile home.



'Vanderbilt Barbie'
This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair,

archless feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white

socks. She prefers that you call her Willow . She does not want or

need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Vanderbilt Barbies and the

optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free.



' Antioch Barbie'
This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional

accessories include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his

1979 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find

since the addition of the infant.



' Bellevue Barbie'
She's perfect in every way.

We don't know where Ken is because he's always out a-'huntin'.




' Dickerson Road Barbie/Ken'
This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken

by simply adding or subtracting the multiple snap-on parts.

Big Kid School

Last week, I finally received the letter telling us which school Zeke was going to be enrolled in this Fall. Since we reside in the county outside the city limits, we were originally zoned for a school 6 miles in the opposite direction from which I commute each day.

That just wasn't going to work for any of us, and since the city schools have the ESP program (that would be Extended School Program, not some sort of clairvoyant elective course...though that would be good), Hubby and I felt it best to lobby for a spot in one of our local city schools.

So I made the pilgrimage in and filled out the paperwork. We're all set for Kinder Kamp in July, and the phase-in period begins in early August.

My baby is going to SCHOOL!!! *sniffle*

I'm sure the transition will be less of a big deal for him as it will for me and Daddy. It's a milestone. A HUGE milestone. Am I ready for it?

When I look at what I'm paying for daycare right now, I'm definitely ready for it. HA!

Anyway, it's all good. He's going to love going to "big kid school." He's such a little man. *grin* More about that soon.

Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day!! Kudos to all the mamas out there reading this. (Dads, you have your own day next month.)

This lovely bouquet arrived at work for me on Friday, thanks to my wonderful hubby and my two awesome little boys! Hubby swore he had nothing to do with it, so I informed him that if that was the case, one of his sons must have gotten hold of his credit card. LOL!

I'm typing this on my laptop with my almost-11-month-old pulling the screen down so he can see me (which is not good for laptops in general) and my 4-year-old who has been watching Scooby Doo for the past couple of hours. Since Hubby won't be home until June 1, it looks like this year's Mother's Day will be a quiet one. (Oh yeah, and happy birthday to my dad! Mustn't forget to call him later.)

It's been an awesome year for me in terms of motherhood. We now have a second little boy in our lives, and after what we had to go through to bring him into the world, I have to say today is a great day to sit back and reflect on those times and where we are now. Life just wouldn't be the same without these two little guys!

Just a few days ago, I went and got Zeke signed up for kindergarten. He starts Kinder Kamp in July, so his daycare days will be officially over. *sigh!* And I still remember bringing him home from the hospital and having to tell Hubby to keep his eyes on the road instead of gazing at the baby so much! :)

It all goes by so fast. It won't be long before we're taking Zeke to buy his first car. He already tells me he has a girlfriend at daycare. This was verified by her asking me a bunch of questions about why Zeke was out for several days a few weeks ago (when we went on vacation), and that she's glad he's back because she missed him. (What??) I know it's not anything serious, but it does get you thinking, at least as a mother.

So for the rest of today, I only have 4 things on my agenda: laundry, dishes, cooking for next week, and playing with the boys and having fun! Zeke's supposed to be painting a flower pot for me for my dahlia, and I told him we could fly his kite in a little bit. Gabe will just be happy to be outside. It's actually nice out there today...no tornado warnings of floods. I meant to blog about the Nashville May Day floods, but there's plenty of news about it on the Internet already. That's definitely one to remember!

Anyway, mothers, enjoy your kids today! And enjoy being spoiled, if that's on the cards for the day, too! *wink*